The Fun and Games of Real Life

Sunday afternoon was slow at the restaurant where I work delivering pizza.

I exited the bathroom in time to hear my workmate Joaquin, at the front counter, talk about good-looking waitresses probably asking men to do their job. After a minute, I accused Joaquin of sounding quite offensive. I even accused him of sounding like a pimp, one who presents the world with delectable commodities who happen to be “young hot girls”. Since we were being crass. He did sound like that, to my ears. Also, we were Front of House (with no customers), whereas his and my filthy work area is Back of House. I then admitted that I entered late, and tried to hear him out. It was me, a female driver, Joaquin, a male driver who’d told me he was recently invited to wait tables, JoeBoss, a male manager/cook and Robin, who is male and both driver and a waiter.

I joined in the discussion; I felt compelled to. I inserted, in context, “Why do women have to be judged only on their looks so much?”and Joaquin actually sounded even more pimp-like and sexist. I said “Joaquin, I love you but you’re very very sexist. Ha hah ha! And I hope you know it’s illegal to hire based on sex.”

His response was “Nobody’s talking about sex! Wait a minute! IF I did bring a waitress in here, and she was at least what most people would consider good-looking… wait, wait, my friend over there is applying for work here and since he’s a guy, he should be a driver… er wait, I’m just saying some waitress might use her looks to flirt with a man and ask him to do her job.” I had to state “male/female” to clarify my statement about legality because twenty two year old Joaquin, hadn’t understood. He seemed to think that I had been referring to something else when I said “hiring based on sex”.

I can’t state the whole discussion here because I don’t remember it all. At some point after only a few minutes, I said “I am obviously very triggered about this, because of the horrendous PTSD that I have about this very issue, and my shift is almost over so I will try to quietly punch out and leave” but I also definitely said beforehand that it’s been law a longterm law in the US that one cannot deny hiring based on sex. I also stated that I am recommending to management, who was present, that Joaquin not be a hiring recruiter (although he called it “bring people in” so I used that term) because he’s doing it based on looks and gender/sex.

But I couldn’t leave, because I had to bring my credit card receipts in from my car back to Front of House, for the check-out procedure this time with JoeBoss, the manager on duty and get paid my daily tips. Reminiscent of several sexual and violent assaults I had as a waitress or driver; both jobs subjected me to sexual assault. Same situation – I couldn’t easily leave, because I had bills to pay.

I was courteous and very quiet during the check-out procedure. After paying out, JoeBoss said “May I just explain one thing?” and I said yes. Here’s my memory of what he said:

“In here, we prefer females be wait staff and males be drivers. Nobody wants some burly tall guy approaching their table. At least not our customers. Plus, that’s just how it is. And it makes sense for guys to be drivers.”

I said, “It’s illegal to hire based on sex.”

JoeBoss said “No, it’s not.”

I turned around while saying, “You might want to look up that law” and I left.



I received a beautiful ceremony from the spirits about empowering people with their own song. A huge act, taking only an hour but potentially transforming lives.

I help Bear with one segment, and Hawk with the other. It worked, and then it worked again, but then my humanity with its angst interrupted. So I asked, “How do segments mesh?” and I received a resounding “YOU are Bearhawk.”

I am not one who can always LIVE UP to power like that in quotidian trudging, but I also have my own empowerment song and I plan on utilizing it more now.

This is the veve of Bearhawk. Upside down. Hawk wing and bear claw. MESHED. Like US humans.

We all have powersongs. Learn/create/acquire yours, and sing it. A lyric from a song of mine: “Feel your power, use your voice.”

I will demonstrate, hopefully.

Hello from Mimosa…

I visited Mimosa today and re-kindled my longstanding textured love for the Mimosa Tree, met the goodgood folks, felt the healing musical cooperative determined vibes of the commune, and …
and thanks for having me

commune life

by Aurora DeMarco

I am down here in Louisa helping to start a new community called Mimosa. Mimosa was formerly known as Sapling but when my friends Sapphyre, Edmund, Kaya and Ponyo moved in, we decided to change our name to Mimosa.

According to the Global Healing Center, “Traditional Chinese Medicinal practitioners have long revered the bark, leaves, and flowers of the Mimosa tree for its potent health benefits. The Mayan people of Central America also revered the plant, and commonly used it for aiding trauma injuries and burns. And while little modern scientific research has been conducted on the qualities of this plant, time-tested ancient wisdom has long praised this herb as an important therapeutic tool.

“Usually, for health applications, the bark of the tree is shaved and dried and used in tincture and capsule forms. The leaves of the plant can also be dried and used as a…

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The Irony of Houston

Hurricane Harvey hits Houston.
Irony of placement and human effects is portrayed here.

your passport to complaining

As of this writing, over 2,000 people have been rescued from flooded areas and another 30K are expected to evacuate the US’s 5th largest city.

HurricaneHarvey Hurricane Harvey Hits Houston

Harvey is being called a once in a 500-year storm.  It is thethird 500-year storm in to hit Houston in the last three years.  And with other super storms like Sandy and Katrina in recent memory, it seems like something more than bad luck is going on.  Is climate disruption responsible for Harvey?  We can’t really know.  But we know our activities are likely making things worse.

Penn State professor and climate change researcher Michael Mann, who led a recent study that found a human “fingerprint” on extreme weather events, wrote in The Guardian on Monday that while it’s impossible to say whether climate change “caused” Harvey, “[t]here are certain climate change-related factors that we can, with great confidence, say worsened…

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Wrapping the planet in plastic – fun, or not?

Plastic wrapping the planet for fun.

…cuz I say NOT.

Now, how can I be smug about this, humans covering the planet in plastic? There is a theme to this blog, after all. Greener (wink) Than (wink) Thou.

Oh, ok. I can make like I decided it’s a great way to employ the destitute. Rag-pickers need work too, ya know! And the people who fish for a living, well, they can employ OTHERS, to pick out the plastic from the fishes bellies!

Uh oh, my cynicism is hard to hide these days. Did we REALLY elect someone who thinks profit is more important than the 7th generation? Hmmm, maybe I can find work as a professional troll. Uh oh, cynicism and bitterness is overtaking my world, like plastic overtaking the planet.

I have begun to use wicker baskets for food shopping. There’s this: EVERYbody looks inside my basket. We can start talking about it, which fills several needs of mine: to not harm Earth, and to interact with its inhabitants.

AND, I will sometimes use my free hand to hoist my nose ABOVE the gawker, and point out my clear and present superiority to THEM, who after all don’t have the delicious food I do, and didn’t think of using a basket to haul it. And by doing so, I’ve snuck in a lil JAB at them because I am GREENER THAN THOU (to be read with thunderous audio imaginings)!!

So there.

Pictures of Earth’s Destruction

Pictures of Earth’s Destruction.

They’re going around the web. Here’s just one:


I posted some more, on Facebook. A bunch of friends shared about feeling distraught. After a couple more heartening posts and an invitation to an upcoming workshop on sustainability, I posted this:

My Pagan religion has me knowing that the Earth is my body, which ups the motivation to Walk More Drive Less, buy almost nothing that’s brand new, never take in plastic bags, ETC and then some, ad nauseum, just ask my beloveds. Therefore the news (&these pix) often *really* hurts, cuz over here in my lil bright green ray of sunshine , I often miss this kinda bad news… but I can cheer myself up. I recently started composting again, am still car-less, and started a blog called Greener Than Thou. (too self-referential?)

It’s definitely not just overpopulation, it is OVERCONSUMPTION. And many US’ers don’t see it because they like to be surrounded by golf-course style finery, and pay for the degradation to occur elsewhere. I’m gonna go cry. And continue my simpler smaller lifestyle in a place w/no sprawl, lotsa public transportation (full disclosure: I’m getting another car soon), and only buy used stuff. That saves $ too, with which I could afford more eco-conscious meat. I am considering raising chickens. I’ll announce my blog when it’s presentable.

:::If you’re reading this, I must consider it presentable! Here’s a motivator, entitled:

“Depleting oil fields are yet another symptom of ecological overshoot, as seen at the Kern River Oil Field, California.”


Thanks for reading my blog. Above in this post, I “out” myself as Pagan, disclosing my motivation for this blog. This blog o’mine has an amusing title, which has value in itself, I hope. I often wanna share how easy it is to lessen one’s carbon footprint, amount of solid waste, ETC. Many folks are so guilt-feeling about their eco-habits that if they see me go out of my way to do an eco-action as simple as recycling, they consider me …”greener than thou”. It’s happened countless times.

And I raised twins alone, so I know how to do it frugally too. So last Thanksgiving (2014)  I posted on Facebook a “Green and Frugal Treatment of Slow Draining Sinks”. ‘Twas helpful for several folks. That’s when I thought of blogging about a green and frugal lifestyle.

So here we are. Yet another way Peggy likes to spend her time, which earns zero dollars, harumph.  Hope you enjoy it and remember: if you develop a zero tolerance policy for taking actions that you know harm the Earth (<—see, a religious devotion), you can feel Holy, in my religion. And ya know what I said about not buying new? Your clothing might be HOLE-Y too. Check carefully before buying used clothing.

Yes, you can groan. Or call me out on Bad Humor.

Car discussion. Addenda welcome.

Ok, let’s look at the car.

Walk more. Yes, I’m quite serious.

Notice your use of the car, because every minute of its use is harmful.

Do not leave your car idling.

Carpool (WAAAAYY more fun, and keeps you in touch with friends/neighbors!) as much as you can. Offer rides. Accept them. Use HOV lanes.

Work closer to home. Work from home.

Enjoy public transportation, in which you can people watch intently, or have good down time for reading that novel you’ve wanted to explore.

Park far away from places, instead of grinding your teeth about a parking spot 10 feet closer to the door. Are you really that lazy, or have you simply unknowingly joined a rat race that wants to grab territory? No, you probably don’t truly want to be like that. Keep doing this walking a little farther, until you notice yourself being much more relaxed and maybe even smiling when parking farther away.

Same concept with errands. If you thought about it, you’d realize that surely you needn’t drive a block away, but we’ve been trained to use our car for everything. Think about it. You’re not a volunteer for the stressed out rat-race, are you? Remember, it’s more fun, social, intelligent, and greener to walk. Get a personal cart if need be.

That smug feeling in your chest is stroking the planet’s yummy ticklish spot.

:::smile::: “Please don’t give me a bag.” :::smile:::

Here’s the game: do not take in one single new plastic bag and find out how you still have annoyingly too many of them. You were going to re-use… BUT.

Anyway, the cloth tote shopping bags are way more fun, stronger, and have cool logos etc. I saw one the other day that said, “Groceries ‘n shit.”

Habituate yourself to creatively hauling goods. Adopt the statement: “I feel so much better for not contributing to climate chaos.” Notice how many things have convenient carrying handles on them already.

You say it’ll line your waste receptacles, hold Fido’s solid waste, etc. But see how it quite frequently doesn’t? And there are bajillions already available. Better yet, more efficient sizes are made (esp. for dogdoo), and many are biodegradable. These plastic bags are NOT. No need for one more to come home with you.

Really, to install yourself on the higher moral eco-ground than your neighbors, adapt a zero tolerance policy about bringing in any new plastic bags. Notice the difference. See below. 

Be smug, and don't bring one more plastic bag home.

Be smug, and don’t bring one more plastic bag home.

Here’s how:

1.Get some (enough for an average shopping trip of yours, plus one) re-usable shopping bags, ones that you care for (at least a smidge of care).

2.Use them.

3.That moment in your Putting Shit Away when you would have dealt with plastic bags, put your tote on the door going out. THAT VERY MOMENT. Or fold it up and put it in your purse, if it’s one of those awesome scrunchable totes.

4.This is when to remember the picture of a pelican strangled by a plastic bag, and pat yourself on the back for not causing that horror. Pat away.

***If you leave it in your purse or in your car, here’s what to do. DON’T AQUIRE ANY NEW PLASTIC BAGS. Instead, forgive your forgetful self, but buy a new cloth tote shopping bag. Repeat step 3, while planning how to never have to buy another new one. Unless it says “Groceries n Shit.” Or “This bagholder is Greener Than Thou. Kneel.”

You will quickly change this needing a bag thing. You’re on your way to sanctimonious eco behavior.

Greener Than Thou.

Contributing less to climate chaos is more fun, saves you money, and is irritatingly correct. I’m here to hold your hand until you’re truly Greener Than Thou. 

We grew up with conveniences. Who knew we were being trained to trash the planet?

Well, now we know, and we know too much. It hurts. We now realize the plastic bags are harmful. “So I pay extra for the g-d things!” Eliminate them easily, says I. You won’t believe how fun that is.

Now we’ve learned without doubt that cars hurt Earth. “My entire world was designed around my personal vehicle being part of my identity and my means of functioning!!”  With this blog, you’re literally going to enjoy using the car less, believe it or not.

I’ve been Greener Than Thou since before climate chaos was a gleam in its daddy’s eye. I’ve learned how to make it be easy, fun and effective. You’ll feel Greener Than Thou for an eensy weensy sec, till you remember how effin serious this is. And then hopefully you’ll ponder how to make more of a difference. Cuz we really really matter, we humans. Meantime, let’s clear some conscience and have some fun.

Am I saying that you have to change habits from childhood? Even when nobody’s looking, wtf? Yes – but you already knew that. And you CAN, easily and cheaply. “Those sanctimonious eco-snobs with their expensive Priuses, ability to shop daily, and their servants, what do they know? Unlike them, I gotta work for a living.”

That’s my point. Part of it, anyway. It is FRUGAL (“simple, plan, costing little”) to be Green. And I want to help us not hassle with every little annoying decision, yet still have less impact. We all want that, to actually feel HOPE about the planet and future humans. When we know we aren’t contributing to climate change, we feel better. We needn’t pound our chests and be self-righteously boastful, but if we can just not soil our own nest, wouldn’t that be awesome? 

So let’s get started.